Ex-General Motors opens 1st Russian factory

GMC has opened a new factory in Russia today, at the moment Russia enjoys by far the best business environment, stable economy and rapidly growing market. Unfortunately, I could not visit the ribbon-cutting ceremony near St. Petersburg , so I delegated this mission to Dmitry Medvedev.

As you probably know GMC is running out of cash, by the end of the year the biggest out of the Big Three will have run out of cash completely.
And there is a high probability that General Motors will be no longer exists. Such an outcome would be a severe blow not only to the economy of the USA, but the world economy as a whole. Luckily, the Russian government and led by its strong leadership decided to step in and save the dying giant of auto industry.

One of my best friends and close associates Oleg Deripaska (accidentally he is also one of the richest men in Russia and the world, but these two facts are unrelated), the owner of Russian Machines [Русские Машины] has agreed to help GMC by buying out all of its stocks and assets (if there are still any left). As the result of this friendly acquisition GMC will join Russian Machines Group under the name Capitan Motors because according to our laws no company can have rank higher then Prime Minister (and I am only a Colonel).

Today the first car assembled at the Russian General Motors (renamed as Captian Motors) has left the factory. According to our national traditions this Cadillac has been made by high-ranking officials and GMC administration. So here is a picture of our first Cadillac in Russia: